No clue what this post would come under, but whatever it is, thank the sweet lord for it. I've always wanted to play agony aunt. And here's my first formal chance!!
Q. I found white hair in my bathroom sink this morning. I don't think they are mine, so they've got to be my husband s. What should I do?!!
Well, take them out of the sink for one, or you'll have one clogged drain. You may also take them out, after a while - in case you wanted to play with them, and swirl them around. To make things more interesting, comb your hair for a few strands of black hair and throw them in the sink too. Now you can swirl around black and white hair. But don't forget - take them out, after your done. There'll be more hair my friend, don't worry.
Q. What do you think I should wear to welcome my husband home? He's coming back after ten days. And we're kinda newly weds.
Nothing?
Q. I think my husband is seeing someone else. He comes home with a smile on his face, flowers or just a plain hug most of the time these days and we almost always make love more than twice each night. What should I do?
Get over yourself woman! If he comes home nasty, read to fight, and sleep in the guest room he doesn't love you. Other wise he's seeing someone else? Enjoy it while it lasts.
And if you really want to check, even though you'll hate yourself for it later, try checking his mail or his phone. Sigh, women!
Q. I've been lusting after my teacher for the last two months. I can't sit through her lectures without getting a hard -on, just looking at her. In my defence, she wears pretty bold stuff, and she is young! The thing is, I've made excuses to meet her after hours, in her room - notes, punishment, the likes. And she's kinda come onto me too. Actually, she HAS come on to me. I know it. Do you think if I should go for it?
Let's see... Go for it on her table? Your grading will probably be based on something else. You don't sound like an amateur, so, if you think your little major can take on the enemy...
Q. I... er.. lyk.. have .. ummm.. this, ya know, lyke... ummm problem, lyk ya know? Erm... lyk.. What ummm lyke should I lyk do?
Now here's a tough one. Try using, english words more often. For assistance, try the dictionary. Or even the newspaper. Try using each word you find, and you should be on your way!
Q. I love my boy friend. I really do. We're perfect for each other. It's just that... he broke my nail the other day!!! I mean, really really broke it. Now I have proper grown nails on nine fingers. Oh god what should I do? Help!!
Get out! He did that?!! This guy has got to go. I mean, he broke your nail! Can't take stuff like that sitting down. Stiffen up that upper lip! If you just keep quite, he'll break a toe nail next. Then what'll you do?
Q. I've sending this female so many more friend requests. I want to make friendship with her. She is keeps me up at night. She talks dirty talk and I love it. But she refuses to adding me. What should I do?
Aah. Orkut. For all you know, she's a big hairy guy. Get out of the virtual world, and find someone who actually exists.
Q. I saw this old man on a bike the other day. He was wearing a lungi. And nothing, really nothing underneath. And.. umm.. I don't think I like what I saw. Does this mean, I'm a lesbian?
Awww sweetheart! That's a terrible thing to happen. Always makes you feel sick. No I don't think that means your a lesbian, I think the man was just old. And old. Don't condemn the whole breed!!
Q. This guy in college, is soooo cute! But he doesn't know I exist! I've tried everything from parading past him to laughing real loud when he's around. But in vain. What should I do?
Maybe THAT'S why he's glad not knowing you. Jezus, where's your attitude, woman? Get on the high horse, ignore him, and definately do NOT parade around or do that shrill laugh. And he'll come and talk to you. Guys can't take being ignored.
Q. I just lost my job. I never really liked it, and I'm glad I can finally look into and decide what I really want to do. Then why am I feeling restless? Not happy?
Don't worry about it. You'll be fine once you find something to do with your time. I understand though... it can't be fun stealing pens from your own house, can it?
Q. I feel guilty about having gotten together with my boy friend after listening to a friend of mine, who gave me 10 ways to get a guy. What should I do?
Oh stop with the mind games, will ya? How about just telling the guy about it, and seeing how he reacts? You can go on from there. Take a deep breath, and charge, horns first.
Q. I think my girl friend's faking it. She makes all the right noises and stuff... but, it's just something she said the other day, that made me think. How do I find out?
There's no way you can. *evil grin*
Yours forever sthupitly.
If you have any questions or need advice, write in to sthupit girl!!
Vacation?
hmph.
That was an entertaining read! :D
Ha ha ha
So u have become an agony aunt now :P
Pretty good read though.
Agony Aunt,
Sthupit Girl really needs a vacation. Any suggestion of places (read asylum)?
*a reader with worried eyes*
@ s & stier : thank you! thank you! I loved reading it too.
Dearest co^th,
I'm glad you wrote in. Me thinks, sthupit is doing pretchy good. It's just that this generation doesn't know how to losen up, and laugh! They're too stuck up.
*granny sticking her tongue out*
All my love,
SG
aaah...some humour at last...and look who's talking about vacations :P
*showing all my thumbs (12 in all) at the monitor*
take care
thanks for the laughs
are you sure you did? After all that these two have to say, I'm starting to wonder.
Yours forever sthupitly.
lol.
Here's a question:
I want to be a super hero. But I don't have super powers or a fancy outfit. What should I do?
P.S. You can tell if the girl is faking it. Feel for the slight tremors. One can't fake that.
Dearest p,
Thanks for writing in. Everyone s a super hero. Sure, we all don't have the same powers, but so what? If you need an outfit to prove to yourself, just wear your underwear over your pants.
All my love,
SG.
P.S : And here I was thinking, you were a guy!! Men, Sigh.
Lol.Nice read ;)
Oh,I have one question too.If I feel I know I am the biggest loser on the planet,what am I feeling?
Answer: You're feeling right ;)
And If i wear my underwear over my pants,does it have to be red underwear over blue pants? :D
And about the orkut thing..is it really that hopeless? I seem to have no luck otherwise ;)
Thank you.
Dearest Mr.A,
Thanks for taking the time to write in. Firstly, the color of your underwear needn't have to be red if your wearing blue pants- it can be, but there's no such law. However, the more the vibrant color shock the combination gives, the better. Unless you have other things that might shock people. *evil grin*
Secondly, if your feeling like a your the biggest loser, then you're NOT feeling right. That's the chessiest q-a SG has ever come across. She recommends a few shots of vodka.
SG shakes head in sadness at the next question. Kids, sigh. You really wouldn't know how hopeless you are, considering the only place you seem to be trying is in the virtual world. [ Ignore the part where the fact that you ARE trying in the virtual world adds to your being a hopeless-figure-points]. Chuck all these walls that you seem so happy hiding behind, you can't be as bad as you think you are. SG doesn't think your that bad, if it helps.
All my love,
SG.
Agony aunt,
I have a problem, I read shtupid girls post of agony aunt and it troubled me. It was so bad i couldnt sleep at night and i have no idea wat went through her head. I like this page but this post worries me. Should i stay away for ever?
lol... kiddin.. It was a fun read!!!
Yours ....
Lol. I love it. It's the kinda answers I'd like to give out.
*Hugs*
@ Dark: Awww c'mon... you know you loved it.
@Triya: lol, the effect our similarities used to have to slowly starting to wear off :)
Thanks for dropping by you guys,
'forever sthupitly.
shit this comment thing actually works!!
You've just solved one of life's greatest mystries!! Congrats!!
'forever sthupitly.
Dear AA,
I know this girl who writes a whole lot of weird stuff on her blog, but of late she has started to write some decent stuff as well. Now the problem is that each time I compliment her, she thinks its coz I am in love.
Could you please ask her to take a vacation? Maybe a trip to jamaica will be good for her...else a deserted atlantic glacer will also do the trick.
Thanks for the help
Dearest Smartypants,
For someone who writes/ used to write alot of stupid stuff on her blog, you seem to visit very often. On a more serious notes, compliments can be hard for some people to accept, I guess she's just one of them. Bet she loves them anyway.
Somehow, people who keep talking about asking other people to go on vacations, to me, are the ones who really require it themselves.
Delighted to help,
SG.
hahahahaaa..
this is too good!!
I can't stop laughing!!!
hahahaa agony aunt's too good!!
all the best in solving problems!!
[;)]
GOOD sense Of humor!!
Danke.
Don't feel shy, ask away :)
SG.