I used to complain of her over protectiveness. I used to smile and reassure her, everytime she got worried 'cuz I hadn't gotten home on time.
And now she's going to be gone. I loved having my grandma at home. She kept my dad in check :) We'd all indulgently listen to her relate the same incident a million times.
But, I've seen the way her eyes used to light up everytime the phone rang. I've heard the hope in her voice everytime she wanted to know who'd been on the phone. And then, I'd seen the light fade away... when she realised it wasn't for her. It wasn't one of her children calling to talk to her... to ask for her. About her. It happened all the time.
And then for some insane reason my grandparents decided my parents had done their duty, and it was another childs turn to take care of them. Duty, my ass. The only reason they were with us was because we all loved having them around. It so turns out, not everyone thinks this way.
I have never seen, I could never imagine... my parents becoming a burden. I could never imagine throwing them away in one corner of the house, because they were becoming a nuisance. It shames me and angers me. How can you do such a thing?
They're your parents for heavensake. Tomorrow, you're going to be in the same position. And don't give me that bull about "I'm never going to be a burden on my kids." Nobody wants to be a burden. They don't do it and love every minute of it. It's the worst feeling in the world... feeling helpless. And instead of helping them through dealing with this new feeling.. you crib.
How can you crib about having to do something for them? Is that what they did when you kept them up with your howling when you were 2 months old? Is that what they did when you thought you'd seen a monster in your cupboard? When you'd hurt yourself.. when you were down with fever... broken a leg.. had a broken heart? Is that what they did??
They bought you everything you ever needed... and you thanked them by never saying "thank you". They provided you with the best education... and you thanked them by leaving home. They bought you your first car, and you thanked them by driving it drunk. They bought you and your wife a new home and you thanked them by kicking them out. They baby-sat your kids and you thanked them by yelling and shouting at them.
Well, I have news for you mister. They didn't do all this and more because it was their DUTY. They did it because they loved you. And all you can do for them, is... You know, I'd rather you did nothing, than do stuff grudgingly. I'd rather you never told them how much you loved them, than keep reminding them of how much you were giving up, just for their sake.
How can you crib, when no matter what you do or say, they'll always wish the best for you... They're going to be gone one day... they're going to be gone for good. And their last thoughts would only be of regret for not having done better by you. Of having failed you somewhere.
Old age is called second childhood. Please don't give me that pathetic line.. that "old people are a burden". Yes, I've seen the nasty versions of old people too. Learn to forgive. Learn patience. But please don't ill treat your own parents. Don't treat them well, because it's your duty. Treat them well, and with respect, because you love them. I'm not preaching Kaushik. I'm begging.
And what's the best part?... they won't think wrong of YOU. They'll think they've gone wrong somewhere... can you live with that for the rest of your life?
