It's been bleddy long since I've written. But I've got a valid reason- my template got lost and every time I visited my blog- the white background with black text on it shoved me into a spiral of abyss. NOT the fact that the number of people who visit here has dwindled down to a count I need only one hand to well, count on. It's just the template that upset me enough to go speech less.

My final year project just sucks. Everything I've done up to now or downloaded and called my own (which it actually should be considering it took more than a month to get that code to work), is turning out to be useless. If I really want to be able to SHOW something, I'm going to have to start from scratch, which even if I wanted to do, I couldn't do. So to say the least, this semester does not look too good.

I've had a couple of sleepless nights since after my dad has decreed that he shall be trying to get me married at 23 because it's the "right age for girls". And I use the word "trying", because it is SO not going to happen.

I've finally gotten a new phone. Nokia- 6500-> It's black and it slides! Sadly today it's also malfunctioning so it might be getting replaced soon. Pictures will come up soon.

I started writing this in the morning, and now it's around 10:10 PM, so you can imagine where I started and where this could go- which you shouldn't really make yourself do for health reasons and just take my word. Good news though is that it isn't going anywhere right this minute, maybe in another post soon.

Oh and by the by, I hope we get home an Oscar this year. Slumdog isn't THAT great a movie, sure the picturization is good, but I think something like TZP was WAY more brill.

Anyhoo, pleasant dreams or good day, depending on when you are here.

All my love.

If you haven't been there these past few days, get your asses there pronto, you can always come back and read this.

I FINALLY went for one of the much much much talked about professional shows at IIT-M. Yes, it's sad that I've been here for practically a decade and NOW is when I've finally gotten a chance. Somehow or the other Saarang came between some exam or the other, and well, I had things to prove.

I did NOT think Sonu Niigaam would be fun. I mean it was seriously cool- and you know how hesitatingly I use that word. But it was SOO COOL. We did the whole cell phone waving in the darkness, and the loud singing when the music is cut out and dancing. He made ME dance, would you believe it? Hell, I STILL can't believe it.

The band was brilliant too. They started with two Rock On songs, which got the crowd yelling way before Sonu even came onto stage. Gunjan, who I have never heard of before, did a couple of songs while we waited for the star to appear- but she was awesome too. And then came the man of the hour. I swear people were cheering for 5 minutes flat before he could get a word in.

He kept us on our feet with all the more punjabi-dancing-numbers, including a very very old "mera rang de basanti joda". I did NOT know we had so many Bollywood lovers in town! A new song for Saarang which as lyrics had "Aaloo... bhindi... mooli ... mattar paneer" was created right then. Terribl terible, but still SOO COOL.

Have I said how COOL?

You absolutely had to be there. I have always wanted to do the singing and the cell phone thing. Always always. And now I have. It was SOO COOL.

I shall say tata-bye-bye before I bug you with more of the "soo cool", oh crap I just did that again. But it was just SOO COOL. Like Koze says, when your kids ask you why you didn't go for Saarang 2009, you can weep.

On other news, I have finally started doing "social service"- I'm doing reading for the blind twice a week. And it feels so so so good. I'm telling you, if someone asks you what do you do with your time and all you have to say for yourself is "I watch TV for more than 5 hours a day, or sit in front of my laptop for the same", then you my friend, need to get off your arse and make yourself useful.

Hope you guys have a lovely weekend yourselves,

All my love.

Another death. I'm not quite sure what to make of it. At first, I was untouched by this "phenomenon". I lost two of my grandparents within a few months of each other and remember crying my heart out- I remember crying, I just don't recollect WHY I was crying. You could say it's because they just passed away you dud. But it STILL hasn't registered that they're not here anymore.

There's times when it does feel real. When knowing that I'm never going to see them again makes my soul scream, literally. But most of the time, I'm just, just. Ugh.

This friend of mine lost her mom, watched her die, doesn't have a dad already and now it's just her and her sister. I've spent two days with her.

I CANNOT even begin to imagine what they're going through. I refuse to, maybe. But I cannot. I just can't.

Hello childrens!

I've been riding on like a three day high or something, and the need to go onto the rooftop and yell my heart out still hasn't gone. Not too many things, just a few small ones that make me happy.

One, for the first time in 3 and a half years I finally liked my college for a weekend. Liked liked it. Did you know it's 60 bledddy years old? That the first convocation ceremony saw Jawaharlal Nehru give the welcome address? That even the IIT's are only 50 years old? That students of the first batch actually flew in from across the globe to attend the diamond jubilee celebrations at their Alma mater- and to see these people so excited and animated to be back, to be a part of something that's so rich, so old (?)... I dunno, it just felt brilliant.

Two, a couple of days before the inauguration I had a brainwave- since this is going to be so big and there's like at least 5000 people expected, why not take the opportunity to do something good? So, we decided to get permission from the Dean that would allow us to raise funds for a charity. Zeroed in on The Banyan, received permission 24 hours in advance.

So, we made drop boxes which were so so cool by the way- wrapped up boxes in plain colored paper, made banyan trees (with the hanging roots and everything) and made paper cutouts of little ladies holding hands to stick around the box. Did I say how cool it was?

Anyway, so all that was done. The first day didn't see us collecting too much. Actually, nothing at all. Because no one really knew what was happening- we didn't have time to advertise about this or anything. So the next day I gathered up a troop and we all went scouting on foot- to each and every person on the campus and made them contribute, even if it was just one rupee.

Guess how much we made!! Guess guess!! Eight freakin' grand. In two days.

Three, my exams are finally over! Sure, I don't care about any of them now- I used to. But that was because I thought I still had something to prove. But I don't! I really really don't. I'm free. I guess it's weird hearing someone say that, but it's true.

Four, now that I'm free from all the emotional burden I was carrying around, I can finally make time for the things I wanted to do. Last year I actually kept 5/6 resolutions. I worked my ass off for CAT, I went for dance class, learnt how to play the guitar and even wrote an exam (which I have passed with merit by the by), let all the people in my life know that they are important to me and much loved (this is like an every year resolution) AND got an excellent job.

This year, I completed one I made four years ago- have made the most of my time in college and actually reached the final semester with only a slight heart burn. The main stuff for this year includes making time out for my friends and doing all the stuff I've denied myself.

Now, before I ramble on and on and on, I shall sign off. Hope you guys have a good week(I have the entire week off. Ha.)!

All my love.

So, first set back of the year has been received. After all the good things that had been happening, I guess I should have expected it. It's not too big, considering I didn't want it to happen too much in the first place, but still.

Anyhoo, Happy New Year peoples! I forgot to put up that senti post I usually do- so seriously, HAPPY new year.

I'm tonty one!!! The exclamations have got to stop. I got my nose pierced to mark my entry into actual adulthood. And it looks good- I tested it for about a week before making it public knowledge. Yay.

I figured out the weirdest thing the other day. People can out grow people. Like clothes. But it's true. And sad. There's a whole part of you that belongs to them, a whole entire part. And yet somehow, there is now this large huge distance between you now. And because of the old age and wisdomness, instead of hurting, it just leaves you sad.

Right then, I have to rush. How likes you the new template?

All my love.

I need to update.

Before I say anything else, I've got to make one thing clear. I'm not a christian and I haven't really celebrated Christmas since I moved out of Bombay, but let's just say the spirit lives on. We used to do a play before the midnight mass at the church and I used to be one of the angels (wings and all) and then we spent Christmas day eating good food and re-enacting the play at these orphanages- it was awesome. I love the colors of the season, I love the hope and joy it brings, and hence the decor on my blog.

More closer to home, we've celebrated the coming up of Christmas with the bestest hot chocolate fudge ice cream. Since I can't bake any cake or cookies because my microwave died on me, we have had to make do with the wonders of chocolate cooked on a flame. Salted nuts, hot chocolate sauce and glazed red cherries on vanilla ice cream.

Dad's playing Santa on our behalf to the family up north. Being unemployed is advantageous in the sense that you can get away with hand made gifts. Luckily for the family, my work is not so shabby. I'm quite proud of the way this one came out and hence, here it is for you- gush away.




Shopping, which I enjoy only when it's for other people, has been pretty much all I've been doing all week. The perfect this for this person and the perfect that for that person. Sister dear was treated to one of those tie up hair bands, that she'd wear to sleep if she could have her way. There's just something about surprising people with stuff they've always wanted to have but just haven't been able to buy for themselves, things they've thought went unnoticed. Try it out some time. It's really fun.

Hoping you've been just the right amounts of naughty and nice- where's the fun in being nice all the time? Naughty is good, NOT being nasty. Wishing you happiness, and peace, I leave you with We Wish you a merry christmas,

All my love.

For the first time in roughly four years, I've spent an hour and a half a day actually LEARNING. There's been this international conference going on in college- I'd usually get involved with the organizing and that'd be the extent of my involvement, but since this one the staff wanted to handle, they just made attendance compulsory to make the auditoriums look more full. Not one to even attend such things, I went with my ipod loaded with two new movies and some Full House episodes. Only, to my surprise there were actually people from abroad- proper universities like Rutgers and all, even profs from IIT Bombay! I loved listening to their speeches even though ALOT of it had little to do with my course work.

So, that's reason one of the lightheartedness that I've been experiencing. Learning, I find, always make me happy. Specially after the early deaths my brain cells have been sentenced to these past four years.

Reason number two is because soon approaching is the end of this road. And the last stretch looks infinitely tolerable now that the staff allotted for my subjects and project work will be lecturers who wouldn't be bothered to even take classes. It's the least they can do.

Reason number three is that I am now officially an Accenture employee, thank you very much. The job offer has been signed sealed and delivered. I have a very nice t-shirt that came along with the offer letter- one my mom had to literally force off my back to wash :D I love the company already and I hope I won't be too disappointed.

Reason number four is that Pride and Prejudice (BBC series) that I now have the pleasure of watching thanks to Zee Studio. I would like to go on record to state that both the movies (Bollywood and Hollywood) were abominable compared to this one and the book, at the same time asking you to put previous acclaims down to temporary insanity.

Reason number five is that my birthday is coming up. And for once in my life, I've got a whole list of things I DO want, and am actually saying it out aloud instead of worrying about if I deserve them or not. Mom, dad, sis- if you're reading this, just to remind you of the decision we arrived at after today's discussion- you are to ditch the search for a perfect phone, and work on buying me the perfect car instead.

Reason number six is all the wonderful people in my life. Sis, you may leave me breathless but you're like those just perfect rays of sunshine that warm you and leave you smiling. Dish and Simrat, you guys are the like the smell after the first rains that leaves you happy and satisfied. Mom, we bug the hell out of you but then again, you leave no stone unturned in returning the favor. And you, the people of the blogging world who STILL visit, muah! You make me smile.

Reason number seven is well, there's nothing else I can put this unencumbered feeling down to. There's a right time for everything. For letting go, holding on. For wanting to just hide under the covers and not want to face the day, for liking what you see in the mirror and actually looking forward to the day. For worrying about every tiny smile you feel you have to hide, for every spontaneous hug you let yourself enjoy. You get the general idea. What I'm trying to say is, have faith. When the time is right, you'll be free and ready to believe again. Until then, eat chocolate cake and enjoy your girl friends. Don't be in a hurry to get to the other side, you'll get there when you are ready.

I leave you with Mary's Boy Child Jesus Christ- really helps singing it.

All my love!

P.S. Check out the human calendar in my side bar! Me loves.